Dear peasants, Soon I’ll take the podium and pretend to not use the teleprompter when I speak to the dregs of society in America, some of whom make less than $1 million/year. I’ll throw in some insults of Obama and lay out my plans for turning the country around. Of course, I won’t really focus …
Tag Archive: romneyisrich
Aug
30
Jul
15
Bain of my existence, again!
Dear losers who make less than $100,000/yr and have to do actual work, There has been a spike in concern about my years at Bain Capital. Understand that I “retired” in February 1999 to rescue the Olympics from catastrophic failure of which the world hasn’t seen until the London 2012 Summer Olympics. When I left …
Jun
28
Obamacare will cause impotence!
Dear poor people, Today the Supreme Court upheld the Affordable Care Act or as we derisively call it, Obamacare, because by labeling it as such, people know that Barack Hussein Obama, whom they’ve been told to hate for unclear reasons, is behind it. Some clarifications are in order: Obamacare and its individual mandate was …
Mar
28
Layoffs are both fun and funny!
Dear people who won’t have car elevators in their future homes, Today I told the amusing story I’m sure Wisconsin voters (really all voters) will love. One of most humorous I think relates to my father. You may remember my father, George Romney, was president of an automobile company called American Motors … They had …
Mar
27
Hold the elevator … for my car!
Dear losers, So, yes it has come out that my renovations at my San Diego residence will include an elevator for my automobiles. What people don’t know yet, because of Secret Service concerns, is that it is very environmentally friendly. Instead of being powered by electricity harvested by burning coal and emitting carbon dioxide, sulfur …
Mar
13
New Pinterest board: People I Love
Dear peasants, Here is a link to my new Pinterest board: People I Love. The people you love have a lot less money and/or market capitalization. http://pinterest.com/notmittromney/people-i-love/ Yours truly, F Mitt Romney
Mar
12
New Pinterest board — Places I Keep My Money
FYI, http://pinterest.com/notmittromney/places-i-keep-my-money/ F Mitt Romney
Mar
06
More about my non-slut wife’s claim she doesn’t consider herself wealthy
Dear poor folk, Yesterday, as I noted, my wife stated she We can be poor in spirit, and I don’t even consider myself wealthy, which is an interesting thing Some have noted that her comment was taken out of context. So for clarity, here is the fuller text (from ThinkProgress.org): Well, you know, that’s so …
Mar
05
My wife doesn’t consider herself rich, but I do
Dear peasants, Earlier today today my lovely wife, who isn’t a slut, said the following: We can be poor in spirit, and I don’t even consider myself wealthy, which is an interesting thing. It can be here today and gone tomorrow. Two points to note — first, she may not think she’s wealthy, but she …
Feb
25
Hellooooo. Helloooo.
Dear poor people, I’m trying to get used again to the sound of hearing myself speak without the echo. There are several reasons I spoke to a not-quite-capacity stadium: I wanted to illustrate the opportunity for growth in my campaign The emptiness represents my core convictions My campaign staff is filled with morons I wanted …
